I always wonder if people ever truly think about their actions before they commit them. Recently, I've been lead to believe that they don't, which is rather unfortunate, but I try to be understanding, to the best of my abilities anyway.
Every person's situation is different. Every person is different. While some may have similarities, you will find discrepancies between your situation and another person's. I don't believe that I can 100% say to someone, "I know what it's like, I've been in your shoes," & it's taken me a long time to get there. Heck, there are even some days where I feel as though I am second guessing if a situation presents itself is identical or not to another that say, a friend, has been in.
Every person's situation is different. Every person is different. While some may have similarities, you will find discrepancies between your situation and another person's. I don't believe that I can 100% say to someone, "I know what it's like, I've been in your shoes," & it's taken me a long time to get there. Heck, there are even some days where I feel as though I am second guessing if a situation presents itself is identical or not to another that say, a friend, has been in.
I push myself to be there for others when I truly shouldn't. You would think that getting burned over and over again would leave me with a sour taste in my mouth, but honestly, I just don't want people to feel as though their life is not worth living, because everyone's is. As I'm getting older though, I'm starting to realize that the saying, "Actions speak louder than words," is one of the truest statements I've ever heard. For example, when someone says that they want you in their life, yet fails to prove that they do, what would go through your head? Is it something along the lines of, "Why am I making so much effort," or is it, "What did I do wrong?" There are plenty of responses that may venture through your mind, all of which are valid.
I've had quite a few people this last year or so (2018, and so far in 2019 as well) that have proven actions speak louder than words, both in a positive and negative light. I've had friends that have stepped up to the plate, apologized for actions in the past (in the particular situation I'm thinking of, I wasn't even angry, because, at the time, they were doing what was best for them and their life), and have remained true to their word. They've actually shown that I can trust them and not be wary of trying to figure out what their true intentions are. Now, on the other hand, I've had some say, but not produce actions to go along with their words. But, at what point do I say, "I'm done," and walk away from the situation? It's a flaw and a blessing, as I usually will let those that act that way come and go as they please.
My vow, to anyone and everyone that I know, in 2019, is to keep the honesty flowing, even if it were to bite me in the rear. I'll start to say what's in my head and heart, and stop, for fear of causing a fight or making someone irritated. I've come to terms with a few things in the process. One of them is that I may lose friends, or that those "relationships" may be strengthened because I finally had the nerve to say something about how I felt I was being treated. I feel as long as I'm putting the effort in to be truthful or to be upfront with people about situations, I will feel better about how I'm delivering my words and feelings.
I feel as though a big part of holding back is my anxiety. No, I'm not trying to make it an excuse, but it comes with great hesitation. I think of any possibility that could happen, and what every outcome could be. Trust me, it's time-consuming, and quite often energy draining, but I usually will power through it. The worries in the back of my head range from, "But, what if I say this, and this person blows back up at me," or "It's just not worth the time and effort of telling someone how I truly feel, because they'll never change." Sometimes, there are thoughts in between as well, but they'll never become reality unless I choose to make them as such.
My vow, to anyone and everyone that I know, in 2019, is to keep the honesty flowing, even if it were to bite me in the rear. I'll start to say what's in my head and heart, and stop, for fear of causing a fight or making someone irritated. I've come to terms with a few things in the process. One of them is that I may lose friends, or that those "relationships" may be strengthened because I finally had the nerve to say something about how I felt I was being treated. I feel as long as I'm putting the effort in to be truthful or to be upfront with people about situations, I will feel better about how I'm delivering my words and feelings.
I feel as though a big part of holding back is my anxiety. No, I'm not trying to make it an excuse, but it comes with great hesitation. I think of any possibility that could happen, and what every outcome could be. Trust me, it's time-consuming, and quite often energy draining, but I usually will power through it. The worries in the back of my head range from, "But, what if I say this, and this person blows back up at me," or "It's just not worth the time and effort of telling someone how I truly feel, because they'll never change." Sometimes, there are thoughts in between as well, but they'll never become reality unless I choose to make them as such.
